


and if you want, we'll share this life

by Imestelomel



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Because that's Molly's love language let's be real, Canon Non-Binary Character, Canon-Typical Violence, Comfort, Double Drabble, Drabble, Drabble Collection, Fictober, Fictober 2018, Fix-It, Fix-it within a fix-it, Fluff, Gift Giving, Hand Jobs, Hints of multiclassing, Molly's swords, Near Death Experiences, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Other, Quadruple Drabble, Romance, Sex, Sex Pollen, Slice of Life, Sunburn, Trauma, Triple Drabble, Weddings, Wish, mentions of torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-01 15:59:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 3,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16287554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imestelomel/pseuds/Imestelomel
Summary: Alternatively titled 'Widomauk: Fictober 2018'(A connected series of drabbles of Caleb and Mollymauk's past, present, and future.)**Note: Molly is non-binary with male pronouns in this fic**





	1. Poison

**Author's Note:**

> *Walks into Fictober 13 days late with Starbucks* Hey, y'all! I've recently acquired a job with a lot of downtime, so I'm hoping to force myself back into writing regularly. What better way to do that than with a personal drabble challenge? Anyway, I'm sticking with Widomauk because I'm in denial and still obsessed despite the Mighty Nein having been longer without Molly than with him. (Never underestimate a fan girl's ability to keep a ship alive.)
> 
> Title derived from Overjoyed by Matchbox 20

There were black, snakelike tendrils spreading from the arrow shaft protruding from his thigh. He took a shaky breath and looked around to find Nott hiding in a crevice looking troubled and afraid. A burst of light caught his attention; Caleb, letting loose a fireball against a small horde. 

Mollymauk snarled, his instinct to protect rising up, and pushed himself elegantly from the wall towards the fray. Poison? He would not be brought down by poison. He was a blood hunter, risen from the dead, and he was far more terrifying than anything else that went bump in the night.


	2. Tranquil

“Your tail is doing that thing again.”

Mollymauk hummed, and his tail remained wrapped around Caleb's wrist, the spade end twitching ever so gently against his inner elbow. The wizard’s mouth twitched. “You know that I am ticklish there.”

There was another hum, presumably signifying Mollymauk hadn't paid attention. 

Caleb turned back to his books, his globules of lights dancing low around them as the sunset painted the sky in deep purples and pinks, the first stars emerging above and behind them.

“I love you.”

Caleb blinked, then smiled softly and leaned over to press a kiss into Mollymauk's curls.


	3. Roasted

_ The flames were blinding, lashing out against the inky black of the night. The screams had stopped, but still he struggled against the hands that held him back. His face would be blistering in the proximity of the heat save for the tears that dripped down his face and off his chin. _

_ He could hear voices. They were telling him he couldn't turn back, but he already knew that. Already his soul was black with the sins that he’d committed. _

He woke, still crying, still reaching towards flames, to soft arms wrapped around him. 

 

“Don't worry, darling. I've got you.”


	4. Spell

“When is he gonna be fucking done? I thought he said it would only take a minute!”

“Hush, it hasn't been a minute. And anyway, he needs to concentrate and if you keep yelling you're going to ruin it!”

“I think by definition y’all are all yelling…”

“Shut up, Fjord.”

“Wait, wait, look you guys! I think he's done!”

A large shimmering door appeared between the trees, glowing silver amongst the gloomy evening. A cheer erupted from the Mighty Nein as Caleb sighed and leaned back, satisfied. 

“You did it.” Mollymauk said quietly. ”You made us a home.”

Caleb beamed.


	5. Chicken

“What are we doing here, Mollymauk?,” Caleb hissed as the server walked away, leaving a bottle of wine that cost more than a bottle of good ink.

“It's called a date, Mr. Caleb. It's what people do when they're feeling romantic and flirty and want to show their significant other a good time.” Mollymauk smiled and brushed his hair back with a perfectly manicured hand. “Now be a good boy and eat your chicken.”

Caleb sighed. Molly did look ravishing in his emerald green dress, and it would be a shame to waste the outfit. 

Caleb picked up his fork.


	6. Drooling

“Ah, does this look okay?”

Molly stared as Caleb walked out of the small dressing room provided in the tailor’s shop. The coat was still a deep shade of brown like his usual coat, but this was close knit wool, with clean lines and shiny brass buttons that would make Nott cry. The fit made Caleb's shoulders look strong and proud, and for an instant Molly caught a glimpse of the wizard he could be, free of guilt and torment that weighed him down.

It was fucking hot.

“Mollymauk?”

He jumped. “Um, yeah, it looks great!” 

Caleb really blushed beautifully.


	7. Exhausted

Caleb was tired. 

It was that bone-deep kind of tired, the kind that made him want to stay huddled in his bedroll and set off alone again. 

He wasn't worthy of these people. He wasn't worthy of care and affection and family that loved you when you did not love yourself.

As if reading his mind, Mollymauk placed a lavender hand in his own and squeezed.

He hated that he gripped Molly's hand tight. But he was too tired to do otherwise. Maybe tomorrow he would leave, take the burden away from the others.  

But for now, he held on.


	8. Star

The scar, though it had been made by a single straight blade, was jagged, and spread across his entire chest like a starburst. 

Molly hated it. 

He tried to hide it. He wore a shirt with buttons rather than the loose linen shirt from before. He entered the bath before anyone else could. 

He couldn't stand to be gawked at. 

It was Caleb who made him feel comfortable. Caleb, who entered the bath repeatedly with his head held high, proudly bearing his scars. He met Mollymauk’s eyes the fifth time, the challenge clear. 

In that moment, Mollymauk first loved him.


	9. Precious

The book’s binding was cracked and aging, an indicator of the years it had seen with the Widogast family. It held mysteries and power that couldn't be measured.

It was precious to Caleb. So very, very precious. 

But there was one person who was more precious than anything in Exandria to Caleb. 

And he was currently held hostage, a knife held to his throat, bloody and weak.

Caleb held the book forward with a steady hand.

“It’s yours.”

“Caleb, it's too important!,” Mollymauk yelled as he fought against the arms that restrained him.

Caleb smiled wryly. “But you are more.”


	10. Flowing

Caleb had never really had the chance to observe Mollymauk’s abilities in action.

But as the harpies had descended and he had been searching for something - anything - to focus on, he had zeroed in on the glistening trails of blood along Mollymauk’s neck, and the drops that wouldn't cease to drip from his hands.

He wondered why it didn't scare him. Everything was scaring him, everything was sending him cowering against the mast, and keeping him from attacking effectively.

But Mollymauk…he was beautiful. Covered in life and surrounded by death, Mollymauk was the most beautiful person in the world.


	11. Cruel

“I can't promise you longer than tonight. Even if you stay, even if we live, even if you travel with us for months, I will never promise more than the day we are in.”

Caleb’s chest felt tight. He wanted to scream, beg, beat his chest and crawl on all fours like a dog, but he sat like a statue at the sticky inn table. ”I suppose that is only fair.”

“It's more than fair,” Mollymauk smiled, hands tight around Caleb's. “But, you know, in my second chance at life, I've found myself very willing to promise something every day.”


	12. Whale

“I've never seen anything that big,” Mollymauk mused, marveling at the humpback whale rolling amongst the waves alongside the boat. 

“Sure about that?” Beau wriggled her eyebrows at Molly and grinned.

“Are you trying to  _ wingwoman for me? _ ” 

“Oh, so you're admitting you want to be wingwomanned  _ for, _ now. That's a big difference from the last couple of weeks.” She grinned and crossed her arms. 

“You really don't need to do that.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yup,” Mollymauk said, grinning brightly. ”I already decided Caleb could do whatever he wanted to me ages ago.”

Caleb groaned. “Please stop.”

Mollymauk laughed. “Never, darling.”


	13. Guarded

Caleb had never really seen Mollymauk completely withdrawn until Caduceus joined them. 

It wasn't terribly obvious. He would be polite and include him in conversation. 

But the smiles were tense, and there was a caution in Molly's eyes. 

“It’s silly.”

“It is not if he troubles you.”

“He doesn't. It's just… He's so comfortable with it.”

“With what?”

“Death. I should be okay with it. I've died twice, as far as I know. But it scares me. And so, I stay away.”

“He brought you back, you know.”

Molly sighed. “I know. That somehow makes me all the more cautious.”


	14. Clock (NSFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beware: here be sex.
> 
> (At least, beware if you aren't into that kind of thing. Otherwise, enjoy!)

The sound of desperate, ragged breaths has already filled the air by the time Mollymauk pulls away from Caleb, lips swollen and wet.

“Okay, darling,” Molly whispers, eyes glinting. “Do it.”

It takes two tries, but a shimmering clock appears over the bed. 

“Now remember,” Molly smiles, and Caleb chokes as the loose hand around his slick cock moves so, so slowly, “If the spell fails, you don't get to come at all.”

Caleb whines, and the hand begins to move with purpose. 

It's been seconds and he's already on the edge.

“You've got five minutes, darling. Don't disappoint me.”


	15. Weak

Mollymauk couldn't stop hovering.

He wasn't even sure _why_. He just knew that Caleb had been troubled by what happened in that mine and he didn't like it.

He had never had such a strong urge to _protect_ someone. Sure, he was attached to Yasha. But she could take care of herself.

Caleb was thin and fragile. He made Mollymauk want to wrap him in his coat and feed him a good stew. He wanted to really care for him, in a different way than anytime in the past two years.

The very idea made Molly wobbly in the knees.


	16. Angular

“I think Molly likes watching this,” Yasha murmured conspiratorially as she dragged the edge of a very sharp knife along his face.

Caleb blushed. “I, ah, think he’s just being silly.”

“How dare you?” Molly gasped in mock anger. “My appreciation for your smooth and shaven cheekbones is nothing but genuine, darling.” He leaned forward to kiss Caleb.

Yasha rolled her eyes as she pulled away to clean her knife, Caleb’s face completely clean.

“I rather think it’s my shaven face between your thighs that you truly appreciate,” Caleb whispered with a covert wink.

It was Molly’s turn to blush.


	17. Swollen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friendly reminder Molly is functionally illiterate.

“It’s not what it looks like!”

Caleb blinked. “It looks like you are trying to write something.” He walked forward to take a closer look at the disjointed, shaky writing. “You are practicing… Your name?”

Molly winced. “I didn’t want to show you until I could do it perfectly. I’ve been working on it all day.”

The wizard smiled and picked up Molly’s hands, massaging the shaking and overworked fingers. “These must hurt.”

“They do! I don’t know how you do it, Caleb, writing is so _hard_ ,” Molly whined.

“Well, I am proud of you.”

“Really?”

“Of course, Mr. Mollymauk.”


	18. Bottle

The contents of the vial were green with a pink shimmer in the sunlight. “Are you sure about this?”

“Very.” Mollymauk strutted over and plucked the bottle from Caleb’s fingers. “The shopkeeper told me it’s great for  _ enhancing  _ pleasure,” he purred.

Caleb smiled, and bent over to take off his boots. “Then let’s experiment.” He heard Molly chuckle.

“It’s topical. And a few drops should be- Oh, shit!”

Caleb turned to see Molly topless and covered in the liquid. “Molly?”

A low purr filled the room, and Caleb took a deep breath. It was going to be an interesting afternoon.


	19. Scorched

Molly hissed as Caleb slathered his blistered and heated skin with a poultice Caduceus had concocted. “That hurts like a bitch!”

Caleb shushed him and kissed his shoulder. “I’m sorry. But I  _ did _ tell you to take a break from the sun for a bit.”

“Yeah, yeah, you were right,” he sighed. “But the day was so beautiful and Jester and I were having so much fun pranking the crew with kraken noises…” 

The wizard laughed and kissed him soundly. “Fun does not keep the sun from burning delicate skin.”

“How was I supposed to know lavender skin is delicate?!” 


	20. Breakable

Caleb’s heart hurt at the sight of Mollymauk kneeling, surrounded by glittering shards of glass. “It’s okay, _schatz_ ,” he said, squeezing his shoulders. “We can find you another one.”

“I know,” Molly whispered, voice heavy with emotion. “I’m just attached. That sword was one of the first things I could call my own.”

Caleb hummed. “Gustav gave it to you, _ja_?”

Molly nodded. “He gave me the coat, too.”

Caleb stretched out his hand and pulled him up gently. “You know, you are still Mollymauk without the sword.”

Molly smiled, his eyes glistening, and hugged him tightly. “Thank you, darling.”


	21. Drain

Caleb frowned, still staring at the cobblestone of the sewers. He could still feel the touch of a lavender hand on his face, and the ghost of the tiefling’s breath mingling with his own.

Mollymauk was confusing him. He was gentle to him one day and accusing him of thievery the next. True, Caleb should be suspected of thievery. He was not above lining his pockets a little more when the opportunity presented itself. But Mollymauk genuinely seemed to have higher expectations of him.

It was an odd feeling.

But he wasn’t really planning on living up to those expectations.


	22. Expensive

“I had the gold saved up and wanted to treat you. See? It'll never get heavier, but there will always be a new blank page of quality parchment when you turn to the back to copy a new spell. You'll never have to pay for paper again!” 

Mollymauk grinned, holding out the leather-bound spellbook, but his face fell as he looked at Caleb. “Darling?”

Caleb shook his head, his face pale. “It is too much. I could never repay you for this, Molly.”

He took Caleb's hand and kissed it. “It's a gift for my wizard. Payment won't be accepted.”


	23. Muddy

“Molly?” Jester whispered. “How do you handle it when Caleb gets all dirty and stinky?”

Molly paused to glance up at Caleb, looking unkempt by the fire. “I'd love him even if he was covered in dragon shit, Jester.”

“Well, yeah, but doesn't it bother you just a little?”

They had never talked about it, those days when Caleb would rub his face in the dirt and let mud cake his coat, but Molly had an idea of what it meant.

“No, it doesn't bother me. It just makes me want to show him how I love him even more.”


	24. Chop

“Thank you for helping me with this,” Caleb said as he shaped a new piece of copper wire.

“Of course,” Mollymauk smiled as he carefully cut licorice roots to size. “I've always been curious about your components, anyway. Your kind of magic is brilliant and practical.” He paused, holding the knife. “Mine tries to kill me just as much as monsters.”

Caleb blinked. “I could… Teach you? It would be smart to have some variety in your arsenal.”

A slow grin appeared. “That would be wonderful, darling.”

If Mollymauk’s eyes were shining when he looked away, Caleb didn't mention it. 


	25. Prickly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've hit 1,000 kudos for all my stories! Holy crap that's nuts.

Caleb peeked through heavy eyelids. “Why are you rubbing my face?”

A very naked Mollymauk smirked. “Because your stubble fascinates me, if I'm being honest.”

“Is this some sort of hint that I need to shave?”

“No, no,” Mollymauk protested seriously. “I really am just fascinated with facial hair. I can't grow any, you know.”

“Oh.” Caleb’s mouth twitched with mischief. “But you could be rubbing other things right now.”

Mollymauk's hand paused. “That. _That_  right there is why you're the best boyfriend ever, darling,” he purred, swooping in for a searing kiss and rolling himself on top of Caleb.


	26. Stretch

“I can’t reach them!” 

Caleb’s pulse pounded in his ears. He could feel his grip on the rock shake. He was never a strong person, and the foot of space between his and Beauregard’s hands seemed impossible.

He looked down at Molly, who was grasping his other hand. “Mollymauk, I- I can’t reach her.”

Mollymauk was tense but calm. “Try. But if we don’t make it, you know I’ll love you anyway.”

Caleb shut his eyes. “ _ Ja _ , I will try.” He squeezed Mollymauk’s hand tight, and looked up at Beauregard. “You will have to reach!”

He prayed and stretched up.


	27. Thunder

Molly brushed some of Caleb’s hair out of his face. The wizard was pale, and his hand was cold to the touch. 

A crack of lightning put the lines of his face in sharp relief, and Molly turned to nudge Yasha. “There’s a storm.”

“Yes.”

“You don’t have to stay. Jester said he should be fine by tomorrow afternoon.”

Yasha stared at him for a long moment, then looked out at the rain falling against the windowpane. “You’re still worried.” Thunder rumbled and shook in Molly’s chest. “The storm is here to stay a while.” 

She smiled. “So am I.”


	28. Gift (The First Wish)

Caleb twisted the ring around his finger and closed his eyes.

 

 

 

_ I wish my parents were alive. _   
  


 

 

An ominous chuckle reverberated in his mind.  _ You can certainly try. _

  
  
  


 

 

The purple tiefling’s limbs shook in the manacles, the cold of the winter’s night setting in. “I told you, I- I don’t know. I don’t  _ remember _ anything!”

“I’m sure you do not. Not yet, at least.” He gazed dispassionately at the tiefling as flames began to spark at his fingers. “But there are ways of making even your fragmented, feeble mind give up its secrets.”

The fire grew, and the screams began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Caleb’s parents are alive. But Trent merely used Caleb’s refusal to kill them against him. In this reality, after Caleb flat out refused to even think of seeing them as traitors to the empire, he tortured them for days until Caleb broke, promising his undying loyalty in exchange for their lives. His parents were sent to the far reaches of the Empire to live in servitude for one of the other archmages, never free, but alive. Meanwhile, due to Caleb’s coerced willingness to follow Trent, the mind magics he used before were even more effective, and soon Caleb Widogast became one of the most feared mages in Trent’s arsenal. His primary role was extracting information and investigating possible threats to the empire, including the rumors of a dark cult started by a purple tiefling with red eyes that went by the names of Lucien... and Mollymauk Tealeaf.
> 
> (Fucked up, right?)


	29. Double (The Second Wish)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Double drabble for Double Day!

The world grew hazy around Caleb. “Nein, nein. I would never-” He panted and clutched the ring, releasing a flurry of words. “I wish to never harm Mollymauk Tealeaf!”

  


 

_Very well…_

  


 

His eyes opened slowly, a daze keeping him from focusing right away. After a moment, he feels the cold chains wrapped around his chest and the trickle of something that felt too much like blood running down his neck. There were elegantly booted feet in his view, but he felt too exhausted to see who they belonged to.

“So, Mage Widogast,” drawled a voice that was too familiar and yet entirely foreign. There was the sharp press of a blade underneath his chin, and he reluctantly lifted it to see red, calculating eyes. “You and your meddler of a handler have been a thorn in my side for far too long. Tell me, did Ikithon truly believe you would be able to stop me?”

Caleb worked his mouth to try and answer, but he felt frozen in shock. “M- Molly…? Please.”

The tiefling lifted an eyebrow. “Calling for someone? I didn’t think a weapon like you was capable of _affection_ ,” he spat.

“No matter. They can’t save you now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm kind of interpreting Wish as I please right now? So in this instance, using the second Wish has only made changes to the reality of the first Wish, it hasn't completely negated it. Meaning, Caleb's parents are alive, he's still Ikithon's coerced dog, but this reality has shifted it to where Caleb is never in a position to hurt Mollymauk Tealeaf. _Only_ Mollymauk Tealeaf. In this shifted reality Lucien succeeded in whatever he was planning the first time, and never awoke as Molly. (I'm also playing with the idea of Caleb retaining his memories of changes from reality to reality once Wishes are in place.)


	30. Jolt (The Third Wish)

“ _Nein!_ ” Caleb screamed as the haze of magic surrounded him once more. “I will not _erase_ Mollymauk! He is good and sweet and I would _rather die_ than permit him to be taken out of existence!” His chest heaved as he crumpled into a ball, hands tight in his hair. “ _Think_ , Widogast. There is a solution. There is always a solution.”

_You are running out of time. How do you want to do this?_

“I know I’m running out, but I have to set things right, I have to set things as they were-” He abruptly cut off, staring at nothing. “I have to set things as intended. I have to erase my meddling.”

He stood, clutching the ring once again. “I wish for life to be what it was intended to be.”

  
  


 

This time there was no voice, just a swirl of kaleidoscope magic.

 

And then Caleb’s world went black.

  
  


 

Caleb shot up in bed with a gasp. He had to know if he fixed it, had to know if he had saved-

“Caleb!”

Mollymauk clutched his shoulders to hold him in place, eyes wide with worry. “Caleb, darling, what’s going on? You look like you’ve just walked through a war zone!”

He lunged for Molly, clinging to him and shoving his face into the crook of his neck, muttering as he did so. “I thought I had fixed it but I made it worse, I made it so much worse, Molly.”

Molly stroked his hair until the muttering stopped, and Caleb looked around, disoriented. “This is the inn by my… my old hometown.”

“You insisted we stay here instead of with your parents. Don’t you remember? We had to tell them the news.”

He burst into tears.

“Caleb dear, you’re worrying me.

“It’s okay, Mollymauk... Everything is perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, how did we get here? Well, Caleb was never intended to meddle with realities; it goes against the natural order of things. To prevent that, the magic of Wish saved his parents, who survived by hiding in their cellar as the flames grew. Caleb still had his breakdown, and was still sent to the asylum by Trent, but was busted out by his parents within a year. They laid low in the area for a few years before Caleb felt the itching need to bring Trent and the Empire to justice, as he and his parents would not be able to rest until they were truly free from his shadow. He sets off on his own, investigating several leads, which leads him to a prison where he happens to bust out a little goblin girl who promises to help in exchange for the promise of a fulfilled spell one day... And the rest is laid out nearly the same way, just with a healthier, less burdened Caleb, who's still shaped by tragedy but wasn't forced to experience complete loss.


	31. Slice

The warm spring moonlight glinted on a platinum jeweled dagger (a previous possession of a rather annoying government official before Jester and Nott had casually taken it off of his hands) and Mollymauk quickly drew it over his palm before handing it off to Caleb to do the same.

“Now press your hands together, and it’s time for the vows!” Jester sing-songed, clutching her holy symbol and beaming.

The two pressed their palms together and stood tall, an almost visible bond of affection passing between them as they met each other’s eyes.

“I’ve loved you for most of my ‘life’,” Mollymauk whispered, just loud enough for the few gathered witnesses to hear, “and just as I promise to love you today, I will promise to love you tomorrow, and the next day, and every day we have in this world together.” The lavender tiefling’s red eyes shone brightly with unshed tears.

Caleb smiled and rubbed his thumb along the side of Mollymauk’s hand. “I promise to never run,” he said, quiet and confident. “I will always love you more than I did the day before, and I will always accept your love in return.”

Mollymauk suppressed a laugh, and the tears he had been holding back spilled over. “I will always protect you, darling.”

Caleb tilted his head forward conspiringly. “We will always protect each other.”

They both chuckled and glanced at Jester. “Ready?” she asked, fidgeting with excitement. At their nods, she placed her hand over their joined ones and bowed her head. “Then in the name of the Traveler, I pronounce you married! Now hurry up and go have lots of great wedding night sex!” She bounced in place, giddy with delight and cast a spell, sending dancing unicorns in all directions. Nott took her cue and began haphazardly tossing flowers into the air along with Yasha, who was more methodical in her movements, and Caduceus waved his staff to charm the strings of beads hanging in the trees overhead to glow with a soft, golden light.

The wizard leaned forward, placing both hands on his spouse’s cheeks, and drew Mollymauk in for a kiss, heedless of the catcalls and whoops coming from their family, specifically Beau and Fjord, though Caleb could hear the distant chanting of a certain little Kenku. “No need to rush,” he said quietly, his forehead leaning against Mollymauk’s, “We have plenty of time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And it's finished! I'm gonna be honest, I never had faith in myself to finish a month-long prompt challenge, but I'm really proud of what is now my 'longest' chaptered fic! I hope you all enjoyed it, and I'm sure there will be more Caleb and Molly and Mighty Nein fics to come from me, so watch out for that. In the meantime, Happy Halloween fellow Critters!

**Author's Note:**

> Remember to take a break to stretch, walk around, get some water and roll out those tense shoulders! Self-care is important for everyone!


End file.
